“What is this post all about?”, you may be wondering.
So be honest…
Ladies… How many of you felt a little uncomfortable reading the title? A little squeamish, maybe? A sting of inferiority glancing at the picture? A little guilty pleasure, maybe?
Gents… How many got a little horny, but in a naughty sort of way? Any guilty pleasure feelings?
Did anyone feel slightly grossed out?
Maybe a little dirty?
Any whispers of shame?
For those of you in healthy relationships, I hope it made you think of your significant other, like, damn, I can’t wait to get home tonight.
Maybe you thought damn, who is that woman?
But regardless of whether you’re in a committed relationship or not, sex is a complicated topic riddled with all kinds of repressed feelings, particularly guilt and shame. And it’s causing a lot of problems!
Isn’t sex a beautiful and amazing and necessary part of life? I mean, we’re all here, aren’t we? Somebody was having sex. And it does feel pretty good.
But society has really messed it up.
I mean, think about your childhood. How did you learn about sex in the first place? Was it through loving and healthy conversations with a respected adult? Probably not. Probably your education came through peers, older siblings, or your own curiosity. You may have learned through religious teachings that SEX IS BAD. It’s a SIN, unless it’s done under a very specific set of criteria. How many people actually meet that criteria? How many people carry around this silent sense of having done something wrong?
Think about your parents, and their parents. And their parents.
We have a bit of a problem on our hands. Sex is a thing of beauty, but collectively we need some major healing, AND a shift in the way we educate and expose our children.
Generations of not talking honestly about it.
Generations of repressed guilt and shame.
Feelings of inferiority.
Then there’s the opposite, which is people who use sex for power and control.
Good people of the world, we need to wake up!!!
I recently wrote this post on Quora on the same topic. Because sex is not bad! It can be the most beautiful thing! But collectively, we need to change the way we portray sex and the way we talk about it (or don’t talk about it).
It’s also about being specific about what we WILL and WILL NOT tolerate, respecting ourselves and our bodies.
And it’s a really big deal.
Take some time to think about your past. Think about any false beliefs you may be holding onto. Think about any repressed emotions you might have. Then take a deep breath, be compassionate with yourself, and know that you are beautiful and valuable and so very OK. But there might be some things to work through, in a loving way, for A LOT of us.
I’ll be back to talk more about it.